One day, I was invited to a pastor’s home. As we were chatting, he started talking about a prominent worship leader. With genuine admiration, he said, “They’re so holy and awesome!” Naturally, I was curious and asked him why he thought so. His answer? “Because they were crying during worship.”
That really made me pause.
Weeping is Holiness?
Somehow, in the modern church, when a pastor or worship leader starts crying — whether in a sermon, during a worship song, or in prayer — people immediately assume, “Wow, this person must be really close to God!” There’s even a trend: just search “crying pastor” online. You’ll find videos of Pastors weeping, with comments pouring in about how “anointed” they are — often from people who have no clue about their life, doctrine, or fruit, but base everything on that one emotional moment.
And then you have titles like “Where is the weeping preacher?” — as if tears are the ultimate sign of holiness.
Also some worshippers when they talk about the Lord, they cry, but some don’t. it doesn’t mean that the one who cries is extremely holy and the other isn’t. For example, Steffany Gretzinger, often cries when she talks about the Lord. When you check people’s response to it, they love it. But others may not cry, and that is okay.
When Crying is good and Joy bad!
Don’t get me wrong — there’s nothing wrong with tears. We see Jesus weep (John 11:35). Paul spoke of ministering with tears (Acts 20:19). There are real moments when the Spirit moves deeply, and tears flow. That’s beautiful.
But here’s the issue: when emotion becomes the standard by which we measure someone’s walk with God, we’re replacing spiritual fruit with cultural bias.
I’m someone who finds deep joy in what the Lord has done in me. I love adding humor. I smile. I joke. I laugh. When I’m in church, I’m often light-hearted — not because I take God lightly, but because I rejoice in Him.
But sadly, that’s not always welcomed. Some people seem to think that unless you’re crying, kneeling, or deeply somber, you’re somehow “less spiritual.” As if seriousness = holiness.
Who said joking is unholy? Joy is not carnality. Joy is a fruit of the Spirit (Galatians 5:22)! If someone comes into church crying and lying on the floor, we call it “revival.” But if someone is sitting in their chair, clapping and smiling, we assume they’re “not taking God seriously.”
It’s heartbreaking how far we’ve strayed from the freedom and life the gospel brings.
Even Jesus Faced This
This isn’t a new problem. Jesus Himself talked about this strange mindset:
“For John the Baptist came neither eating bread nor drinking wine, and you say, ‘He has a demon!’ The Son of Man came eating and drinking, and you say, ‘Here is a glutton and a drunkard, a friend of tax collectors and sinners.’”
— Luke 7:33–34 (NIV)
Think about that. John was strict, lived in the wilderness, wore camel’s hair — and they rejected him. Jesus came joyful, eating with people, showing love and laughter — and they called Him a sinner.
You can’t win with people whose minds are bound by religious expectations rather than spiritual truth.
Where Did the Joy Go?
The gospel literally means good news. It’s a message of redemption, restoration, and hope! David, when the ark was returned, danced like a fool in the eyes of others — and he didn’t care:
“I will become even more undignified than this, and I will be humiliated in my own eyes.”
— 2 Samuel 6:22 (NIV)
David didn’t cry in a corner — he celebrated God with joy.
So why have so many modern churches become places of stiffness, where joy is viewed with suspicion, and tears are the only accepted form of worship?
Final Thought: Let Joy Be Holy Again
Holiness doesn’t always look like we think it should. Sometimes it’s quiet reverence. Sometimes it’s tears. But sometimes, it looks like laughter, dancing, and childlike celebration.
Let’s not shame joy. Let’s not elevate emotional moments over transformed lives. Let’s allow the gospel to be what it is — really good news — and respond accordingly.
If that means crying, cry.
If that means laughing, laugh.
If that means dancing like David, dance.
Because worship isn’t about looking holy.
It’s about responding honestly to a holy God.
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