Paul said in Col 3:17 that everything we do in name of deed should be in the Name of the Lord. Then, he proceeds to state order the right way to conduct, and its all rooted in the Lord. Let’s read Col 3:18-4:1
Wives, be subject to your husbands, as is fitting in the Lord. Husbands, love your wives and do not be embittered against them. Children, be obedient to your parents in all things, for this is well-pleasing to the Lord. Fathers, do not exasperate your children, so that they will not lose heart. Slaves, in all things obey those who are your masters on earth, not with external service, as those who merely please men, but with sincerity of heart, fearing the Lord. Whatever you do, do your work heartily, as for the Lord rather than for men, knowing that from the Lord you will receive the reward of the inheritance. It is the Lord Christ whom you serve. For he who does wrong will receive the consequences of the wrong which he has done, and that without partiality. Masters, grant to your slaves justice and fairness, knowing that you too have a Master in heaven.
Paul’s instructions in Colossians 3 offer profound guidance for the Christian life, especially as they pertain to family dynamics and community or workplace relationships. Let’s explore these teachings in two key areas: family and community/workplace.
Order in Family
Paul’s instructions for family relationships in Colossians 3:18-21 reflect a divine structure designed for harmony and mutual respect.
Wives: Submission with Love and Respect
The instruction to wives is to “be subject to your husbands, as is fitting in the Lord” (Colossians 3:18). The Greek word for “subject,” ὑποτάσσεσθε (hypotassesthe), originates from the verb ὑποτάσσω (hypotassō), which in classical Greek often described military alignment under leadership. In the New Testament, this term expands beyond the military to emphasize voluntary submission born out of love and respect.
This is not about inferiority but about recognizing God’s divine structure for family life. Paul’s focus is on proper governance for harmony, as “this is fitting in the Lord.” A family without structure or mutual respect may face discord. Submission here is a relational response of love, not subservience.
If you do it for him, you will derive the joy from what he does, and you will be emotionally bound to what he does. But know that you do it for the Lord, and that is a safe place to anchor yourself.
Husbands: Love Without Bitterness
Husbands are called to “love your wives and do not be embittered against them” (Colossians 3:19). This love is sacrificial, mirroring Christ’s love for the church (Ephesians 5:25). Regardless of the wife’s actions, Paul reminds husbands to maintain a Christlike attitude—to love without resentment or harshness.
Again, even if she does’t love you, encourage you, or even submit herself to you, husbands love your wife.
Children: Obedience to Parents
Children are instructed to “obey your parents in everything, for this pleases the Lord” (Colossians 3:20). This obedience is not merely about compliance but reflects honor and trust in God’s design for family relationships. Such obedience fosters respect and unity in the household.
Fathers: Encouragement Without Provocation
Paul cautions fathers not to “provoke your children, so they will not become discouraged” (Colossians 3:21). Discipline and guidance should be tempered with encouragement and understanding, nurturing a child’s growth in a positive and loving environment.
Order in Community and Workplace
Paul’s instructions extend beyond the family to the broader community and workplace, offering timeless principles for relationships and work ethics (Colossians 3:22-25).
Workers: Serve as Unto the Lord
Paul’s words to slaves—which we can apply to modern workplace relationships—are to “obey in everything those who are your earthly masters” (Colossians 3:22). However, this obedience is qualified: it should not be done merely to please people but “with sincerity of heart, fearing the Lord.”
Work should be approached as a service to God, not just to human employers. Paul’s emphasis on working “heartily, as for the Lord and not for men” (Colossians 3:23) shifts the focus from seeking human approval to glorifying God in all we do. This perspective ensures consistency and integrity, even when earthly masters fail to treat workers well.
Masters: Act Justly and Fairly
Although Colossians 3:25 highlights the worker’s accountability, Paul reminds masters (in 4:1) to “treat your bondservants justly and fairly, knowing that you also have a Master in heaven.” This reinforces the idea of mutual accountability before God, ensuring that those in authority lead with fairness and respect.
Conclusion
Colossians 3:18-25 provides a framework for harmonious relationships in both family and community. By grounding every word and deed in the Lord, believers can navigate these relationships with love, respect, and accountability. Paul’s call is a reminder that our ultimate reward and motivation come from the Lord, who sees and rewards all actions done in His name.
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